The to do list
Lately I've been kind of obsessed with time and the management of my time. I've gotten rid of my telly, read more books and generally been trying to make the most of every day and every hour.
And I was doing quite good. But somehow, I felt like I was still loosing big chunks of my day that I just couldn't account for. So I started observing my behaviours and discovered that I have a whole secret to do list that I go through on most days. This is not a flattering list. This is the kind of list that you should keep to yourself.
So naturally, the rebel that I am, I'm sharing my list with you!
And I was doing quite good. But somehow, I felt like I was still loosing big chunks of my day that I just couldn't account for. So I started observing my behaviours and discovered that I have a whole secret to do list that I go through on most days. This is not a flattering list. This is the kind of list that you should keep to yourself.
So naturally, the rebel that I am, I'm sharing my list with you!
To do:
- Remind myself that I need a job so I can't hide in bed forever
- Worry about things I can't change
- Worry about things I can change but am too afraid to change
- Cry a little
- Convince my mind that I'm not dying
- Force myself not to have a nap when I get overwhelmed. I'm not tired - I'm hiding.
- Scroll through pictures of people who look happy
- Wonder why it is some people get to be happy and I don't
- Lie on the floor and stare up into the ceiling
- Sit on bed and stare into the wall
- Feel like complete failure/fraud
- Go to sleep feeling restless
- Keep waking up from sleep throughout the night feeling hopeless
- Repeat entire list tomorrow
